What should I do?....

Everything that happened gave my heart and mind so much cofusion..That ended up to a thing i never thought before..A thing i told myself i wouldn't do..because i knew in the first place that i really can't..but because of what happened..something inside me told me to do it..told me to LET HIM GO ALREADY...:(..my mind was really confused as to what to do...i still love him,,but i guess this isn't working out as well as it did before..we were falling apart..everything seems to be so different right now...it's as if i don't know him already.. i don't like to see him,,talk to him or anything..all i wanted was to,,not think about him..pretend that i'm ok and that we were..but my heart was so much hurt..and all i can think of is to end this..to cut the string that connects the two of us with each other..but i don't want him to leave,,i don't like to see him cry..though it hurts so much..and i know that deep inside i really can't...but i also thought to myself that maybe this would be the best thing to do..for us to be friends again..no strings attached..but i don't know who to listen to..is it my heart that says: go on..or my mind that says: let go...but as time went by..i figured out that i really can't..coz everytime i ask myself why..i really don't know the answer...i'm trying to keep us together but i'm falling apart..huh..i hate myself now..:(..help me please Lord..